June 14 2020
Dear Mr. President,
This will be just a quick note to thank you for caring for all Americans as much as you do. I know you were concerned when I wrote about being nauseous and, you know, I don’t need to spell it out. I’m not pregnant (that would be a real miracle) and whatever it was is gone and I’m fine. You didn’t need to call or write to check on me. I know your heart and how much it cares for all of us and how much we care about you. So, let’s discuss your health for a minute.
You have had several tough weeks of dealing with weak mayors and governors who seem to love their cities, states and citizens so much that they want to continue to help them. You have had to deal with Biblegate and defend your freedom to hold the Bible any way you want. You had to pretend not to hear Dr. Faucci warn us that the “you know what virus” isn’t over and numbers are rising in many areas. Finally, you started to plan your own events now that you realize Ivanka and Hope should not do the planning. There’s a lot on your plate. How’s your blood pressure?
It’s none of my business what medications you take (except the two weeks on the H- drug). But, surely, high cholesterol, and high blood pressure must be of some concern. Maybe the first is from your diet and lack of exercise but the second must be affected by your angry outbursts, lack of control of negative emotions and yelling or really loud tweeting. I would like to offer one solution to being so mad at so many people (besides the deep breathing that we already discussed). It has the added attraction of being fun! I used this with a lot of middle schoolers and they loved this idea. Here it is: right down the person’s name on a piece of paper. You can press really hard, even so hard that the paper rips a little. Then tear the paper into little tiny pieces and, here’s the best part, FLUSH THE PAPER DOWN THE TOILET. Right? Wasn’t that fun?
So, OKLAHOMA – O K L A H O M A. Have you been singing the song? “Where the waving wheat, can sure smell sweet, when the wind comes right behind the rain”. Is there a verse about Covid-19 and no masks, a closed environment and a lot of time for you to expel fluids?