June 26 2020
What the hell???? This has been a terrible week, don’t you agree? You know a lot of people are saying you might lose the election. They say you are a terrible leader who doesn’t know what to do about anything, who lies about everything, who blames others for all negative (about you) facts and who totally ignores Melania’s Be Best Campaign. You do listen to her advice on how to drink water while wearing an expensive silk tie. So, there’s that.
Seriously, we need to talk, and by that, I mean you need to listen to some of my advice. I often tell you to take the weekend off and go play some golf or take a dip in the pool. On second thought, don’t do that (bathing suit might not be your best look). Maybe grill a steak or do some yoga. Turn off the tv and, above all, DON’T talk. I think you can’t stop Tweeting because it’s an addiction and until you admit that you have no control over your fingers, nothing will change.
The Invisible Enemy is back, stronger than ever and this time it’s affecting a lot of places you were hoping to visit. Your visit to Tulsa was a big bust. There you promoted the death sentence or at least flogging for desecrating the flag of the United States. Of course everyone cheered, even the guy wearing a bathing suit made to look like the flag! He was sitting on his tushy(!!!!) on the American flag. How about the folks that wore the flag with your face on it? Isn’t that also desecrating the flag? The trip to Phoenix was terrific. You had a crowded church group, sitting shoulder to shoulder, very few with face masks on and they were cheering for you when you used a racial slur. It was hard to believe this was a church. A CHURCH where people CHEER for demeaning others!!!!! What happened to “Love thy neighbor” and
all that stuff? Where were the bibles?
You must be so worried about the surge of cases in the South and West. Oops, I meant to say you must be so worried about the additional numbers of people filing for unemployment insurance this week. No, I meant to say, you must be so worried about your poll numbers all over the country. No, maybe you are worried that you weren’t coherent when Hannity asked what your goals are for a second term. To be fair, maybe he didn’t give you the questions ahead of time. You didn’t have the chance to learn your lines.
Finally, VPPence tried to help you out in today’s Corona Virus Task Force Briefing. He seemed to ignore the rise in numbers of infections and the rising number of hospitalizations and the rising number of people not wearing masks or practicing social distancing (maybe they are still washing their hands and not touching their faces) but he did do you one favor. He no longer calls this task force the PRESIDENT’S Corona Virus…….