November 11, 2020
Dear Mrs. Trump, the III,
There’s so much hullabaloo around your husband’s lack of ability to graciously concede the election to VP/President Elect Biden, that I wondered if anyone is asking how you are doing. So, how are you doing? I wonder if you are super sad, relieved or just worried about your husband’s mental state. His aides and other lackeys seem to be very concerned about him. Apparently, you and Jarod have tried to explain to him the need to move on past the election, but he isn’t “ready” to hear that yet. What if he heard other news that upset him like, g-d forbid, there was an incoming attack on our homeland or aliens have just landed? Would he not be “ready” to hear that either? It’s kind of the job to be ready for anything. The good news is that the bad news about his loss is not the end of the world for most of the country even if the outcome of the election saddened 70 million or so. I’m sure you will be okay, and your son and parents will be okay and, eventually, your husband will adjust to his retirement.
You probably already know that he and I were in a pen pal relationship for almost 8 months. Don’t worry if he never told you about the letters; he probably didn’t tell you about a lot of other relationships or letters or things like that. NOTHING was going on that could worry you. All I did was try and share some advice with him based on my own experiences in life, what was happening in the news and general common sense. He didn’t listen to me just like he doesn’t listen to anyone.
I hope you are thinking ahead and planning your move. You will need to find a moving company because I don’t think your husband can lift the furniture and put it in a moving van, pack up his stuff, or help with any other details and don’t forget the golden toilet. What about your son’s schooling? Sure, he’s learning remotely now but do you want him to transfer schools and leave friends again? He could stay in Washington and live with another family when the students go back to school in person. I also wonder and worry about you and your future plans. If you move to Florida and don’t play golf, what will you do? I guess you could always write a memoir of your time as the First Lady and your work with the Be Best Program. Michelle made a ton of money with her memoir and you know how hungry people are for your words. I sincerely wish you good luck in all your future endeavors.